What Disney's Hollywood Studios Doesn't Need...

...is another show. Good lord, you spend a day at this joint and it's hurry-hurry, scurry-scurry from one scheduled event to another. Guess it wouldn't be so bad if the shows ran all day--like they do at Sea World--but most of Disney's shows shut down just about the time that the Florida sun switches from Atomic to Something Tolerable.

If Toy Story Mania proves anything, it's that the Studios need(s) more rides to fill out the guest experience. Especially family rides.

So, as Jim Hill provides this news about the new American Idol attraction--one more big show--I just gotta think this is another misguided Marketing-driven attraction that throws this park even further out of balance.

Million Dollar Spud

Just back from a ridiculously-long vacation to the sunshine state and the Vacation Kingdom of the World. While there, we made sure to visit Toy Story/Midway Mania ride at Disney's MGM Hollywood Studios Theme Park. More about the ride below. This entry begins with a recounting of our second visit to this attraction.

Anyway, we took the Standby line which was posted at 65 minutes but was chucking along so quick, it seemed like our wait would be maybe half that. Of course, the idiot who thinks that way jinxes himself. And sure enough, the line just stopped.

I used this time to take in the queue (nothing really special, big toys on a thin budget) and the much-lauded Tater Head animatronic (NOT visible to Fastpassers). So we stood watching the Potato. Pretty soon, he started acting weird. He'd freeze. Then he'd hit the wall. He took his ear out (nice). When he went to shove it back in, he kind of just lobbed it onto the floor (ooops!).

Below is a suboptimal, blurry shot of the unfortunate Cast Member who had to walk the gauntlet of grumbling Standby guests so he could replace the giant spud-ear using a highly-themed aluminum stepladder.

(Seriously, I'm totally embarrassed at the quality of this shot.)

"Hurry up, ya hockey puck! Bob Iger spent more on my nose than you'll make in a lifetime!"

Tater Head continued to sputter and whirr as we stood in place for 90 minutes. Once, he went haywire when an irritable guest used an emergency exit near the spud...seemed like some proximity sensor killed the show.

Panic Bar versus Tater Head. Panic Bar WINS!

Eventually though, we did ride (after a 130 minute wait...STOOPID Fastpass). And it is a very well done attraction. Insanely addictive.

MORE Toy Story Mania

Mr. Warmth and Tater.

(c) Disney

Cool or what?

Eeeek!

I am really excited to see this new Toy Story Mania ride--both at Disney's California Adventure and at Disney's Hollywood Studios. But what is it about this image that creeps me out?

Artwork (c) Disney

I can't figure if it's the claustrophobic walls-are-closing-in setwork, or the giant Woody with evil doll eyes that appears to be popping out of nowhere. What other horrors lurk behind these walls?

And what's the deal...is Hamm riding in the car with these guests? Is he gonna bust them for stealing the 3D glasses from Muppetvision?

Here's a mystery to solve: How is it that Disney can create a great attraction and then allow their Marketing folks to fool around and make it look like a wet churro. This is bad.

Still--I'm excited about this ride!

You're Going to (Disney's) Hollywood (Studios)

Artwork (c) Disney

Disney announced a new American Idol attraction that will set up shop in the old Superstar Television building at Disney's Hollywood Studios.

While WDW management should be commended for a) doing something with this abandoned structure and b) using a television property rather than creating another shopfront stuffed with princesses and c) avoiding the temptation to go cheap and incestuous with their own tween-centric High School Musical/Cheetah Girls/Hannah Montana programming, I still have to wonder how well this all-but washed up Fox show will play in just a few years. American Idol is showing its age. The viewing audience for its opening episode this season was its lowest in four years. As malaise sets in and the wind goes out of American Idol's sails, the park will be left with another empty Who Wants to be a Millionaire building.

Still, I'm curious to visit this attraction and to find out how Disney deals with one of the show's most iconic elements: Simon Cowell's signature insults. Many viewers tune in to American Idol just to watch as unfortunates are singled out by Cowell and subsequently ridiculed during each season's initial episodes. Will Disney subject their guests to random acts of mean-spiritedness? If they avoid this aspect of the show, will they be neutering it for guests who are coming just to hear wry British putdowns?

And one last thing...what is with this concept art? The people are rendered about 3x as large as they would appear against the existing structure. As part of this renovation, are they shrinking the building? Are they only inviting the sad victims of bovine growth hormone overdoses? Either way, the whole thing just comes across as something more rinky-dink than I imagine Disney had hoped.

And one last-last thing, again on the concept art. For those who pine for the original Disney-MGM Studios with its Hollywood-That-Never-Was aesthetic, well, let's just kiss that old idea goodbye. If this attraction is realized as rendered, we'll have a sleek contemporary structure and an overscaled, visually hyperactive LED board screaming at the end of Hollywood Boulevard. If the hat wasn't enough, this attraction may well be the cut that kills the old Bob Weis-era Studios.

Oh well, here's hoping they have a Clay Aiken rubberhead wandering the park.