I just ate fourteen churros, two turkey legs, and a Toll House ice cream cookie. And now I have a tummy ache. This is all your fault, you BIG DUMMY!
The State of Florida just released a report that summarizes injuries in the Orlando-area theme parks. Let's see here:
OH MY GOD! Two people got broken ankles walking around in theme parks! AND HOLY GEEZ! Some middle aged lady had a heart attack! AND NUH UH! Someone "inhaled water"...AT A WATER PARK!!!
The worst: someone got nauseated on the Mummy. I wonder why that might have happened?
Seriously, though, safety is such a huge priority for these parks. It has to be...why would people shell out 70+ clams a day just to risk their necks? These reports are just stupid. When these trusted public officials aren't off creating a panic about some crazy, out of control ride that should never have been built, they publish these "idiot chronicles."
And speaking of crazy, out of control rides that should have never been built, check out the number of reported incidents at Epcot. ZERO. Guess that maniacal Mission:SPACE got all the killing out of its system.
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